attending my first human library

my first time coming across the term "human library" was through an event called "my world without you", an event organised by Architects of Life (AOL), to equip people with tools on having difficult conversations, focusing heavily on the topic of drug abuse.

funny enough, the human library was aimed at parents and educators and silly me just signed up without reading that part oops. regardless, it was such an eye opening experience as i've personally never had any open conversations on drug abuse, other than what i've watched on tv.

i had the opportunity to listen to 3 different human libraries. the first was a mother, who had been taking drugs her whole life due to being exposed to the wrong crowd at a young age. she continued to take drugs even after her kids were born, often doing it secretly in other rooms. her turning point was her son, who would always ask what she was doing, and soon after she would be brought in to cnb and isolated from her kids. she finally managed to break free from the drug abuse, and always quotes her son as her inspiration.

the second is a relatively young girl <30 years old, who was sexually abused by her family, partner, and even those she confided in. my heart broke listening to her story as it was really heavy yet very real, and it's a sad reality that many people go through this without help. therefore, the drug abuse started, and she got brought in to cnb as well. i believe she was able to get the help she needed while she was there, and she is on board to start her small business!

the last human library was a 50+ year old man, who had been in and out of jail for about 10 times in his whole life due to his drug addiction. due to this, he expresses heavily about how he lost out a lot in life, watching people get proper jobs and move on, he on the other hand, got disowned by his daughter as she felt like he could no longer be the father figure she needed. this really woke him up to break his cycle, and he is slowly building back this relationship with his daughter, he started up his own community circle and is a mentor who speaks in educational facilities about his experience.

one final section was when AOL wanted to share on how we could approach these difficult topics with kids. my partner was chosen to role play as a parent, while the AOL mentor role played as his child. the conversation started out with the parents saying "don't do drugs" and the child says "who? me? you think i'm the kind of person who takes drugs?" and it was insightful to show how children can feel betrayed/distrusted if parents are too direct with this topic.

we were educated on this framework for approaching difficult conversations:

1. creating a shared experience: "i recently read about how drugs can be incorporated into smoking devices, which is very dangerous"

2. discussing on the topic: "what do you think about this? have you heard anything or anyone around you influenced by this?"

3. assurance: "i believe you are smart enough to make good decisions when it comes to such influences"

in the picture, i'm the one in the yellow shirt! i didn't take pictures as i was so immersed in the human library workshop. despite the governments' efforts to "say no to drugs", i think these types of events are much more impactful, and it also shows us their perspectives on the stigmas and difficulties of finding jobs for them or even integrating back into society. do check out AOL and their efforts to break the stigma of ex-offenders in singapore!